1. |
A Now Empty Place
04:07
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White pine and disease
Every day spent in skis
Having a laugh over occurrences from
Way overseas
Felt assured just to know
There were two more months to let go
Then get just a week
To pack all our shit up and go
I don’t want you to go
And you would agree
Make the best of what’s left until
We’re caught by debris
Now it looks like we’re done
Had a nice last hurrah
Made the best of what’s given and
Tasted the last drop
Gray skies and bright screens
Dwelling in world misery
Feeling connections slip from friends who’ve moved on
Just out of reach
Feeling right back at home
Surrounded but always alone
Then weeks turn to months
And our paradise becomes dethroned
Your face illuminates
And all I think is god just make it end
Just take me back when things were permanent
They give us all congratulations
Education’s not concerned
Our fulfillment comes from empty words
I know that I’m passed my grief
But surely they would have agreed
There was no reason
For completion
Now we’re obsolete
I thought I had nothing to lose
But now I see that was untrue
Now I’m keeping afloat
But I’m caught in the undertow
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2. |
Hold On
04:14
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You told me you wanted to keep it rolling
Not to leave it on the hill
If I had known your intentions I wouldn’t have mentioned
The way we had it still
My only frustration is outward appearance
For looking like I cared
My head in the clouds took a hit coming down
Now my want for love’s impaired
I pulled you closer
Closer I hated how you could
Go on submit me to torture
Please hold on
Fuck all your bullshit analogies
I went from heaven to facing reality
I don't know what you were thinking
I just to hold you i just want to hold you
My attachment to you just arose from panic
Purely instability
If I had really been steady I would have already
Overcame this misery
Now you’re talking to me like it never happened
I don’t need you never did
You pretend it’s my fault this is just the result
Of you going off the grid
Clearly we had a connection
And clearly you don’t feel the need to correct it
I don’t want to hold you I just want amendment
I just wanna know that you wanted affection
All I wanted was a life with you
Where I knew my own self needs
Now i can barely breathe
I don’t want you in my life but
I know I
Can do better than that
I can do better than that
Clearly we had a connection (I pulled you closer)
But clearly we don’t have the means to correct it (Closer I hated how you could)
So why’d you insist that we maintain a friendship (Go on submit me to torture)
And why shift the blame you’re the one that severed it (Please hold on)
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3. |
Lemons
02:46
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I went to school and learned of lichen and heartbreak
Surrounded by these people who I never knew I would meet
Things were going well and yeah that's something that I won’t forget
But never was I ready for what happened when we left
Life is so sour, getting worse by the hour
Seems like life gave me lemons and I hate lemonade
School is in my warm pajamas breakfast starts at twelve
Still hopelessness in excess starts to creep into my cell
Paradise right in my hands yet somehow dropped the ball
And even when I leave it’s like I never went at all
Life is so sour, getting worse by the hour
Seems like life gave me lemons and I hate lemonade
Just wish I made some close connections with someone else who cared
But if you thought you’d read me then you’re visually impaired
Just want to go
Just want to go back
Back to the place and time before
Was you and me and nothing more
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4. |
Summer/Closure
02:10
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5. |
call me!
03:49
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Hey how have you been
Have you been learning something new?
Well I found out that walls don’t talk
But they’ve told me more than you
You left me out the loop last summer
I knew you swam but you’re a runner
You hyperbolized that you apologize
But that doesn’t help I hope you realize that
It wasn’t really up to me and you
But that doesn’t justify what you put me through
I’m hurting and I’m tired of wanting you
To call back
and unpack
What changed your point of view
I know I messed our whole thing up
But I’m not the one to blame
I’m not trying to be the victim
But I lacked the strength to stay
I threw your necklace in the water
Sunk it like the Spanish Armada
In another life we’d stay by our sides
Unfortunate for us we had to divide and
It wasn’t really up to me and you
But that doesn’t justify what you put me through
I’m hurting and I’m tired of wanting you
To call back
and unpack
What changed your point of view
Are you really sorry or just trying
To get some sense of closure?
Thanks for checking in but I’m just fine
Without you taking over
It wasn’t really up to me and you
But that doesn’t justify what you put me through
I’m hurting and I’m tired of wanting you
So call one day
Just years away
When all this has dropped from view
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